Brick

昨夜喝了兩種咖啡

一種是研磨式的黑咖啡，還記得是在羅東買的，上次買的是藍山口味，這次買了原味回來嘗試，只是口味似乎酸了些，不過喝完的舒緩與平靜依舊，尤其我喜歡那種倒完開水的咖啡渣氣味，整個瀰漫住房間，似乎蓋過內在與外在的所有不舒服。

另一種是便利商店的伯朗咖啡，是藍山口味，有人打給我問要不要幫我帶些什麼吃的，我手握熱呼呼的黑咖啡，腦袋是一片空白與延遲，我隨口說了一灌咖啡吧。於是在我喝完這第二杯熱開水浸泡的研磨黑咖啡之後，我拿起這杯冷冰冰的藍山咖啡，有如早晨餐桌前的那杯白牛奶，只是色調錯置。

打開Ben Folds Five的Bricks這首曲子，流暢的琴鍵旋律竟有著莫名的默落與無奈

6 am day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in the dark
The smell of cold
Car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping
I am numb

Up the stairs to the apartment
She is balled up on the couch
Her mom and dad went down to Charlotte
They're not home to find us out
And we drive
Now that I have found someone
I'm feeling more alone
Than I ever have before

She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly
Off the coast and I'm headed nowhere
She's a brick and I'm drowning slowly

我聞著遺留在這房間的咖啡渣氣味，希望它永遠一直在。